It took me a bit of time to actually sit down and begin writing here. It feels big. I know what is asking to be said, but it is like, how could I ever find the words to do it justice?
I eventually came back to my belief in the power of words and the worlds they are capable of holding. I could only trust the energy behind them. I could only trust the love within them. I could only trust that whoever receives this, will feel both in the way they are meant to. Words and their meaning find us in different ways, but always in the ways we need most, when we need most.
I've had a profound realization about hope as the words for this piece began to take shape. I've been referencing hope as if it is something we find outside of ourselves. But that is not what hope feels like to me. Rather, hope feels like what I am. It feels like the song of my soul.
Take a moment and look at yourself in the mirror and realize the miraculousness of yourself staring back. That is hope. You, here, breathing, and alive in this moment. You are the truest and most everlasting love, in form. I say that not to take away from every single bit of what tried to extinguish that hope within you, to muffle your song, to sever your connection to it. I say that to honor you, in all that you have been through, faced, and withstood on your journey. I say that to honor you for being here, breathing, and alive in this moment. I say that in support of the very truth that although hope is never lost, it can undoubtedly at times feel like it is. Certainly, we are living in a moment in time where that is the case for many around the world.
This is where I introduce you to 'The Heart Song,' a publication and movement founded to share stories of hope from humanity. ‘The Heart Song’ is a worldly co-collaboration towards illuminating voices, love, vulnerability, and healing, and a movement to cast light upon the interconnectedness of this human experience. It is a place to unify, and a place to hold each other. It is a place to find shared healing, and a place to find our hope.
It is my deepest intention here that the movement of love awaken the hope that lives within each and every one of us.
We are all woven within the same tapestry of creation - of truth and love. We are interconnected. More so, we are one. Our hope is a tether between our hearts. It lives with the pure intention of holding those who can't quite hear it, and reflects the places within where it resides.
We will hear from voices from all over the world as they express themselves through story, sharing with us their heart's song. It is incredibly liberating to be lovingly witnessed in our expression. It is also incredibly liberating to bear witness to those standing in the courage of sharing their own voice.
The reciprocity of giving and receiving love.
The reciprocity of sharing and remembering hope.
This is the vision I have held for so long, the vision that has come to life in this space. A place to heal and restore the one heart that we are through storytelling.
This is where pieces of my own come in.
It was the Summer of 2018. Something awoke within me during the days of this trip in Morocco. I did not plan this trip, rather this trip found me when I needed it most.
I began to feel this stirring of wishing to come alive in ways I had never remembered experiencing before. I didn’t know quite what it was then, but now, in this moment, I know with my whole heart that what I was feeling was hope. I was hearing the song of my soul whispering to me. It’s difficult to put into words. I can only describe it as this feeling of truly wanting to live, to experience myself and life in ways that would shatter me, but at the same time set me free. It seems like such a simple thing to say yet it is anything but. Hope - four letters that hold the power to put the pieces of ourselves back together, to give us wings, to live through sacred song.
If I’m being honest, I had spent the majority of my life without hope in many ways. I see that now with so much clarity as I reflect back and remember how lost I always felt - clinging, searching, and longing for something I knew deep down but couldn’t seem to grasp in any tangible way. And then all the ways I would cope with the reality of that. I was in a constant battle of trying to survive in this world as a highly sensitive soul, always trying to be what I needed to be to fit in. I was stuck in these perpetual cycles of pain, sacrificing myself over and over again, and feeling how that was literally tearing me to pieces. But I was also unable to stop it. I was completely unaware of what I held within my body that was wreaking havoc deep under the surface. Emotions felt like tidal waves, so I locked my heart away. I became cold in ways. I did not recognize myself, and as I turned 30, I found myself in the absolute depths of this reality.
The truth lives beneath these shadows - hope shining faintly and giving us these moments of it shimmering through the cracks. This is why hope feels lost. It’s buried within the dark. But it is in these moments, where we feel it shimmering, that we touch glimmers of that aliveness. That aliveness that lies beneath, waiting to be reclaimed, waiting to be heard.
As I returned home to my life after my visit to Morocco, I held on to those glimmers of hope I felt within myself. That’s all it takes, because hope is that powerful. Those glimmers gave me the courage to stand up for myself for the first time in my life. Those glimmers gave me glimpses of possibility, of a life I knew I deserved, a life that was waiting for me with open arms. I held on to them in the promise I made - that I would finally choose my own heart and my own path no matter what it took. That feeling I could never seem to grasp was something I would fight to become. I found the courage to leave a very traumatic relationship, and in that, the journey back to myself began.
When we stop running, when we stop numbing, when we stop distracting, there is this moment where we come face to face with all of it - the truth of where we are. And we have to be brought to this place. We have to be willing to see it before we can choose to say, “I deserve more. I am more.” Hope allows us to feel like we can.
So, if I can share anything in this moment, it is this - it is in these moments, where we feel like all is lost, where we see the truth of where we are, where the dark seems like it is eating us alive and swallowing us whole - these are the moments that hold the choice that will change everything.
It is not all lost, it is all being laid out. The light shines brightest in the dark. Hope is the light. Hope guides the way. That is a promise I know to be true. This is the bravest choice we will ever make. But it is always there. And there is always a way. And it will keep extending it’s hand until we are ready. It will never stop singing.
May you feel glimmers of that light in this story. May you feel it in all of the stories to come from ‘The Heart Song.’ May you take hope’s hand again, and again, and again, until it is your own.
Yes, Yes, Yes. Thrilled to be included here, as you bravely follow and share your beautiful vision - your Heart Song.
I'm so proud of you and beyond excited to see how this unfolds for you <3